vulgar thoughts

Let me regale you about the recent dreams I've been having. It is embarrassing for me to explain them but if I didn't express about them in some form sooner, I would think that they will continue and develop further. Which is something I am not particularly looking forward to.

They were two consecutive dreams occurring on two consecutive nights. The first one had me lying on my own bed with someone beside me. On the same bed. It's taking me so much resolve to even put this down in words. It was Tom Welling. Yes. The guy from 'Smallville'. Of all people. But let's not skip to that as I'm saving that portion of the rant for later after the retelling of the dreams. So, we were on my bed. And no, we were not doing anything 'sexual' if your mind starts to wonder into areas unknown. We were just lying there on my bed talking. About normal stuff. I think we were holding hands probably. And the room was dark as in night-time darkness. I don't know what we were talking about but I know I felt calm and at ease with him. Just like a really close and comfortable friend. Except that he was Tom and not someone I actually knew in real life. There was a little sexual tension between us when our feet touched but nothing went beyond that. Allow your imagination to go wild all you want, but I am firmly saying that the atmosphere was of innocent, weird, first-love kind of feeling, and awkwardness.

Hence, ended the first dream. At first I couldn't even remember much about this first dream, let alone what it meant or why I had it. That is until the sequel happened.

The continuation of the dream started off with us returning to the talking and the extremely odd closeness that we were experiencing. I was starting to feel uncomfortable at this point but not so much as to rush out and hyperventilate. Then, of all people, my father comes crashing into my room and starts raving away about me possessing every bad trait a person could have while blindly ignoring the other person in the room. After raving for about a minute or so, only then did he acknowledge Tom's presence in the room. Followed by some more raving and embarrassing awkward moments, and I woke up.

So that's basically it. What I'm most concerned about these two connecting dreams is why on earth would I ever dream about someone like Tom Welling? It doesn't make any sense to me. I don't think he's hot, nor do I like watching Smallville, or liking anything related to Superman except for the Batman part but this has nothing to do with Supes nor Tom. So, yeah, the amazingness that my subconscious can ever produce something as outwardly and incredible as these dreams is beyond my comprehension. Sans the sexual tension but non-sexual feelings.

I think pieces of me are slowly degenerating where I understand less and less about what's going on inside of my own head. Somehow these two dreams are seriously affecting me in ways I don't understand at all and I don't want it to. My grip on reality is slowly slipping away.

I need someone to save me.

visit to miami

The dream last night was probably a premonition of a future season finale episode of CSI: Miami on AXN this coming Wednesday night. Nevertheless, I just thought it would be fun to detail this odd dream I had of Mr. Caine.

The setting was all CSI: Miami like in a typical episode. Yellowish bright, lush green and beautiful sunset or sunrise, depending on the time of day. Everything began like a normal and usual episode of Miami with someone getting murdered, axed, strangled, tossed down 30 storeys high, or stabbed. Each of them ending in death of course because you can't have an episode of any CSI being without a dead victim. Or maybe two if the story calls for it.

Getting ahead of my point here, everything was really playing out like an ordinary episode except that, I'm ashamed to even mention the highlight of my dream, Horatio Caine was dancing. By himself. In the middle of a road. And everyone else was oblivious to this except me watching this episode.

I think I'm embarrassed not because I really am, but for him. There is no way of explaining how my brain works. Or at least how my subconscious part works. A neurologist would be interested in knowing what makes me tick, I expect.

When it ended, meaning I woke up, I was really quite relieved. No, I did not wake up laughing.

failing for less

Just right before I woke up from my slumber, I dreamt that I had obtained a D for Business Law and an E for Management. The two subjects which grades are currently pending for me right now. How scarier can a dream get? And it's supposed to be out this week. And I need to pass them so badly. But the thing is, the way my grades were presented to me were in the form of my old high school method by way of a book and the subjects along with the grades were shown. And the rest of my other subjects also had Ds as I recalled. But I was more shocked about the last two than the rest. I feel drained now.

And this had to happen right after Christmas day and night.